2022-02-14

Today is Valentine's Day, it's the most terrible day of the whole day. Moreover, this year is the most heartbreaking Valentine's Day for me. I met a lady about 2 years via online dating, and we remain as friends for all these days. I was trying to understand her more throughout this friendship. 

One day, I told her that I wanted to give her a Valentine's Day gift. She said okay, and even suggested to have a Valentine's Day dinner as well. I thought she gave me a green light, telling me that I got the chance to start a love relationship with her. I prayed that I could be the best guy for her, treat her well, and learn how to love her deeply. However, this dream lasted for a few days only. On 1st of February 2022, she told me frankly that she doesn't ready for a love relationship yet, and she never plans to get married yet. In fact, she was telling me between her lines that I'm not the Mr. Right for her anyway. 

Of course, this was a heartbreaking news. Fortunately, I've never told my family members anything about her. I successfully remained calm and still till today. The main thing should be, it is obvious that I like her but not to the level of 'love' yet. When a love relationship is not confirmed, I shouldn't fall in love with anyone, so that my sanity can be sustained. For the 2 broken love relationships, I truly fell in love and when the relationships failed, I couldn't help myself into having some breakdowns. 

The main lesson I would like is, never simply fall in love with anyone. When I fall in love, I would think it's forever and pretty hard to quit. The pains remain, but it's bearable. The most important thing is, we should never lose our sanity. Once fall into a breakdown, it takes years to be fully recovered. Some more, it brings more pains to the ones who genuinely love us. 

So, please do not crush into a breakdown for someone who doesn't love you. Take care, my friends!