2021-12-31

The last day of the year of 2021, I thought our lives could be back to the old norm with vaccinations. Sadly, due to all sorts of new variants, the pandemic proceeds and we have to go for a boaster jab. As expected, my depression ended before Christmas. So, I could have a great day on Christmas. 

However, the transition from depression back to normal state was not smooth. It seemed, I was feeling quite exhausted due to the long period of depression. I was the team leader of a group for a subject, and I was feeling terribly tired to carry on the role as a leader. Fortunately, I managed to settle all the required assignments and submitted all the assignments before the due dates. 

There was a course mate, asked me questions about another subject. I was too tired and advised her to refer to someone else. I even told her that I'm having mental health issues and I needed more rest during that moment. You all know the reaction when someone just knows your mental condition. After several messages, our conversation ceased till today. 

The fact is, studying part time is not easy. Another fact is, it's even tougher with such a mental health condition. There are mainly 2 reasons for me to stop proceeding: firstly, breakdown; secondly, bad results. Besides all these, actually studying is really fun. I just want to do something meaningful and studying is one of it. 

During this pandemic, it's really a great time to study. By studying, it could help me to focus on something meaningful instead of the emotional pains. It's also a reason for me to stay calm so that I could have the opportunity to keep on studying.